Monday, July 26, 2010

People we Love!

On July 8th 2010, I lost my MOM. She might of lost battle to cancer, but she definatly got an everlasting Life with Jesus Christ on heaven. She's been battling cancer in several parts of her body for over 15 years. She's had a total of 14 sergeries and different dangerous treatments, adding up to over 100 hours of full body anesthetia, countless doses of strong drugs and morphine. Thru all these years, she's been thru so much, but most of the people who knew her didn't know half the stuff she was going thru, including us kids. She was a strong women thru out her life and never had time to feel sorry for herself. She didn't want any of us kids to know all of her sickness and diagnose everytime she would come back from the doctors office.

My older sister received a call from her doctor on July 1st, explaning my mom's diagnose and her life expectancy from that day. He encouranged her to sign up for hospace. Much to my disbelief and denial my mom's health was rapidly changing. Going from being able to slowly walk, talk and consume a small amount of foods, to rejecting all the foods & liquids, not able to talk and definalty not able to move around by herself with in only 5 days.

Being the youngest in the family and never losing anyone close to me, I denied everything and had hopes until the very end. I could not amagine myself with one someone I loved dearly and couldn't live without. She was a big part of my life and my kids lives. But God had a plan for her. Looking back at the times we spend together, I remember moments when she would talk about heaven and her going there and (to my understanding now) she was slowly and gently preparing me for this exact moment. But you can never be prepaired for it. Young or old, sick or healthy- Death rips a hole thru your heart that never heals. There are times I wake up and reach for a phone to call her, or have a question that I know she would be happy to answer. I pray to God that He would give me strenght to go thru this difficult time in my life, and greatfully Thank everyone who's been praying and being there for my family.

She's impacted a lot of people with her life and I only hope to be like her, and meet with her there in heaven.
"I love you and miss you terribly."